How To Go From Manager To Coach

What is coaching in the workplace?

Coaching is a method of helping someone to set and achieve goals without explicitly telling them what to do. Instead, you help guide them toward their own conclusions.

This is different to management which is, as you’re aware, focused on delivery. Setting goals, making timelines, delegating tasks, developing processes and strategies, meetings (lots of those), conflict resolution, problem-solving, performance management, giving feedback.

Management is directive in nature, meaning that you’re telling people what to do and when. And sometimes that’s enough. Your people know what they’re doing and require minimal support. 

But what if they need more support, either because they ask you or you recognize areas for improvement? Perhaps someone seems unmotivated or you think they might be stagnating in their role. 

Well, this is a situation where it’s beneficial to switch from manager to coach. As a coach, your job isn’t to tell someone what to do, it’s to help them identify areas for development and set them down the path.

As leadership coach Lisa Martin puts it “You’re the limoncello in the lemon martini!” (meaning, you’re a small catalyst that helps someone to see what they need to see). 

Coaches don’t tell, they guide. The aim isn’t to provide all the answers, it’s to play the occasionally infuriating role of questioner and help them find their own solutions.

The most essential coaching skills

If you’re reading this I’m willing to bet a taco that you’re interested in people and their development, and that’s fundamental to the whole coaching mentality!

But there are two particular skills you can hone to become an effective coach:

Curiosity—asking questions

Coaching, as we’ve covered, isn’t about telling people what to do. It’s understanding what they need to know and then showing them the way.

Asking questions will help you to:

• Understand motivators
• Discover new ideas
• Upskill team members
• Increase employee engagement.

It will help whoever you’re coaching to:

• Identify areas of untapped potential
• Explore solutions to problems
• Set personal development goals
• Find the motivation to improve.

Some powerful coaching questions:

• What did you like about that project?
• What would you have done differently?
• What do you see as the next step in your career?
• What steps could you take to improve next time?
• What resources do you need?
• Who else can help you with that?
• What resources are available to you?
• How can you find out more about it?
• When would you like to achieve that by?

As you can see, the best questions to ask are open ones, beginning with what, how, when, who, where.

Asking these kinds of questions leads to a greater sense of ownership and empowerment than if you just tell someone what to do. Also, curiosity is a future proof skill that will serve you well throughout your career, so look to keep alive every chance you get.

For a more extensive list of powerful questions, check out this handy resource from the Co-Active training institute.

Active listening

When you’re coaching someone your entire focus needs to be on them.

Active listening is the ability to tune into the words of the individual and tune out every other noise and distraction.

Closing off notifications, closing your computer (if in person), or finding a quiet place to have a meaningful connection will aid in actively listening. 

Here's a simple framework for active listening:

• Listen intently by removing distractions
• Pass no judgment on what you’re hearing
• Reflect on what you heard
• Clarify if needed by asking open-ended questions
• Summarize what you heard
• Share your thoughts, perspective, and insights.

Coaching and feedback

A quick note on coaching and feedback.

As a manager, a crucial part of your job is giving feedback. But this isn’t coaching. 

Feedback is what has happened in the past, but coaching is future-focused. 

An example of feedback following a sales call: “that was a good call Finn, but you should have questioned them further about their challenges surrounding implementation.”

An example of coaching following that call would be “Finn, how did you feel that call went? What could have gone better? If anything could have gone better, how would you have approached it?”

Knowing when to give feedback and when to coach is a great skill to master, and you may need to combine the two in the same conversation.

After giving critical feedback, you might want to try asking an open-ended coaching question to help someone brainstorm ideas for performing a task better next time.

“Finn, you missed an opportunity by not going deeper on the implementation challenges [feedback]. How can you make sure you spot these opportunities next time? [coaching]”

Alternatively, you might want to start with coaching and, if you don’t get what you wanted, switch to feedback.

For tips on how to give, and receive, feedback, check out Matt Gould’s excellent podcast, “Thanks, Tell Me More”

How coaching can help you with difficult employees

Difficult employees who exhibit bad behaviors aren’t lost causes. Part of the role of a coach is to help people unlock their potential.

Some powerful questions to ask:

• How do you think you are performing?
• What's holding you back? 
• What does success look like? 
• How can you contribute? 
• What needs to change in order for you to excel?

A great example here is a story involving one of my favorite footballers (soccer players, I’m British), Robin van Persie, and my favorite football coach, Arsene Wenger.

Van Persie is one of the greatest Dutch footballers of all time, but he arrived at Arsenal FC under Arsene Wenger as a hot-headed youth who found it difficult to integrate with the team.

Wenger saw his abilities but didn’t like his attitude, so he didn’t select him for games. Van Persie, miffed at not getting the playing time he thought he deserved, spoke to Wenger and asked him why he wasn’t playing more.

Wenger said to him “Robin, you have to ask yourself why you're not the top player yet. Write down for yourself what your qualities are right now and also write down which qualities you think you still need to improve.”

He didn’t give him all the answers, he acted the supreme coach he is and encouraged his player to work it out for himself.

Van Persie developed into a superstar and is now a coach as well.